Blessings in three

Ok, it's time to thank the good spirits that I have three happy, healthy triplets in my life. I am blessed. Sure, they are sick again. Sure, it might be hand, foot and mouth disease (oh that's a real disease folks!) but overall we are strong, mentally and physically.

I can't be funny because several of my triplet mom friends are struggling with new developments in their triplets' lives. They all love their kids as much as I do mine, and they will love them regardless of what pops up but one has to feel extremely lucky to come through the multiple birth process with three completely healthy kids.

There are so many things that can go wrong. And in addition, when you have 3 at once, your statistical chances of having one with a genetic defect are higher than when you have one, right? So it's scary. You could get a mixed bag genetically, and then, since they are usually born premature you have damage due to that, developmental delays, physical damage during the birthing process, etc.

So many things could have 'gone wrong.' But I ended up with three wonderful, bright, healthy kids. I am counting my blessings today. That's all I've got to do.

speak!

Why is it I'm the only one NOT hearing my children say words. My mother in law, husband, nannies, and apparently everyone else are convinced they've heard words come out of my childrens' mouths and all I can think is...."wishful thinking." I hear a close approximation of a syllable that may or may not be them imitating what's coming out of your mouth but I wouldn't call it a word folks. You say 'shoe' A says 'so' or 'sho' and you call that saying 'shoe?' Hmm.

Am I just too hardline? Should I accept a marginal syllable as a word? I mean we are getting pretty desperate here with almost a year and a half gone by and not a word to be found. Other than the usual 'mama' and 'dada' which can be used for at least half a dozen different things other than mom and dad. Sure, triplets take their time and it's quite clear that they understand one another and follow directions and know the parts of their bodies, so I know they aren't 'slow.' But this lack of words is starting to drive me nuts. I keep counting down to their 18 month dr appointment saying we have to get some words by then or we're going to look bad!

I do not want to need intervention, my kids are clearly smart, but perhaps we're just so good at interpreting what they need without words that they have little need to try them. Sigh. Is it time to whip out the flash cards? I am so not a high pressure mom and our pediatrician is just the same and always makes me stop worrying but come on kids! I need a word! Not just 'ba' for ball, I need a complete word like 'up' or 'baby.'

Speak dammit! Speak!

Worry worry, freak and scurry

It seems that some parents just need something to worry about, doesn't it? I remain a relatively calm mom and have called the doctor pretty rarely considering I had 3 infants simultaneously. I'm hoping to maintain that record through the years where boys regularly need stitches and knock teeth out of their heads, but it remains to be seen. But sometimes I wonder about some of the parents who post on my multiples boards and elsewhere looking for advice from other parents.

It just sometimes appears that they are almost looking for something to be wrong. I have had those moments myself where I think, crap, maybe since my kids have been healthy for so long I'm due for something truly terrible and life altering to be thrown at me. But I'm relatively certain that there is the possibility that one could actually have healthy kids with nothing wrong. Am I wrong? Could it actually be statistically possible to have three kids and not one of them have a medical problem that requires intensive treatment during their childhoods? Is it possible that I could end up with no learning disabilities, behavioral delays, motor skills delays or horrible childhood ailments?

Oh lord I'm tempting fate here but I think a lot of parents need to lighten up. The multiples group I belong to has an email group I belong to that is constantly full of parents wondering if their kids are normal or not. Eating, schedules, sleeping, walking, crawling, you name it, it gets asked about. My middle triplet was called dracula for a period of time because only his side upper teeth came out. Sure it was strange, and it's not how the other two got their teeth but it was hilarious! I didn't think that maybe he was missing his middle teeth. But you know what? Having multiples does teach you early and often that not one kid does things the same way. They didn't start crawling the same, sitting, walking, eating or anything the same way! So, the likelihood of all of your children getting their teeth in the same order? Nil.

I guess whereas I see the differences between my kids' development as a really interesting window into how different every kid is, some parents would see it as a cause for concern. The one who is last to do x might have something wrong. The one who doesn't 'keep up' may have an issue. Perhaps I'm just an optimist. My high school friends would find that hilarious. But when it comes to the challenges that life throws in my way? I seem to find the bright side, or the dark humor, in any situation. I think it's a healthy way to be.

So let me reassure you one more time, your kid is OK.