But then it hits me. That voice of reality, which seems to be a young black girl for some reason, says "Giiiirrrrrlll, you ain't 25 no more. You are 37, post triplets, and in clothes with cat hair and toddler snot on your shoulders." Ugh. Might as well punch me in the stomach. I deflate, I try to manage the mess a little bit, stomach still sucked in, pull hair across face, put purse on mucus covered shoulder to disguise. But it's amazing how easily I forget! And the funny thing is that when I was 25 I couldn't wait to be 30. Apparently my brain got stuck back there though. I'm continually amazed to find lines on my face and, when the hair dye starts to fade, grey hairs prolific in my scalp!
I know that a lot of women love their 50s, at least according to Oprah, and I'm wondering does one's brain finally catch on to the age you are at that point? Because as long as my brain keeps thinking I'm 25 I'm going to keep being disappointed when I look down at the truth as I'm walking down the street. Or in the windows of the shops I'm passing. Which used to be a fun thing to do, see how cute I look walking by in my new miniskirt outfit and heels. Good gracious, no miniskirts now. No sirree. If I happen to turn into one of those ladies who tries to dress 25 despite my age? Please, I admonish you all to slap me. I know it might make me cry, but it's better than looking like an ass.
Know what really sucks? Thinking you're 18. I'm pretty sure I'm and 18 year old trapped in a 31 year old body stretched 3 kids wide. It's scary. I don't even put my glasses on after my shower until I've left the bathroom, everything looks so much better blurry and I can go on living the dream, or, maybe it's a nightmare.
ReplyDeleteAnd, on a side note, you too may be wishing for infancy once the babies reach the borderline-verbally-abusive-I-can-say-what-I-want-at-least-once-before-she-catches-me phase. Or, maybe you'll be an awesomer mom than me and you'll be able to avoid that phase entirely...Good luck with that:)
Yeah, the only thing worse than competing with yourself is competing with actual 25 year olds. Those bitches always win.
ReplyDeleteYeah it's the pits getting old. But me too think that I am around 30 not *almost* 35. I can't believe it. I am sure that you are more beautiful today than you were when you were 25 just because you have three darling kids next to you! Thanks for becoming a follower of mine!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I actually blocked that this year was my 35th. I kept saying to myself, "next year, when I turn 35" and honestly thought it was next year. Today my ODD told me my belly was "still jiggly" from the triplets--how's that for a wake-up call?
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