Thursday, September 24, 2009

Another letter to a child

Dear son J,

I hate to be writing another letter to a child of mine including threats of abandonment, my dear son, but here we are aren't we? I'm not sure what I will do if you throw yourself on the floor again writhing and screaming every time I want you to go upstairs, downstairs, in a door, out a door, into the car, out of the car, into the stroller, out of the stroller or just simply want to put a clean diaper on you because you are actively dripping toxic waste from the seams of your diaper.

I mean really? Is EVERY transition that traumatic for you? I have noticed that most of the time, if I give you 5 minutes warning, you do a little better at the stair climbing. So it probably is just that you don't like life to change too fast on you. You probably will be a homebody like me and not like change, even if the current situation (ie filthy filthy diaper) is uncomfortable. But there are some disadvantages. You come from a line of geeks and if you're lucky you'll be a functional one like we think we are. However, if you will never go outside or up or down stairs? You might become one of those crazy shut in kinds who live on delivery food and anything you can order online. I will visit you to a certain extent, but should your front door get blocked more than halfway by pizza boxes and packing material, I will probably just call.

But back to the here and now. As you have probably noticed, we will not carry you, reluctant as you are, up and down the stairs. And anyway, it seems to make you even more furious if we dare to do so. So there is no compromise available. You need to come up the stairs to bedtime when, and I mean immediately when, mommy says to come. Bedtime is the same time every night. The routine is the same every day also, when it is time to come downstairs to start the day. No, you can not stay in the nursery all day and you sure as heck are not staying in the living room with me all evening.

So, and I mean this lovingly, GET YOUR BUTT MOVING WHEN I SAY SO. Otherwise, one of these times when we say "ok bye bye J! We're leaving without you," we may actually do so. Seeing as how CPS might find out about that we will likely be parked just down the block, but I'm just sayin'. If you want to be left behind so badly? You just might be.

As usual, love,
your even lovin' mom


  1. stair phobia?? but I have to agree with you; perhaps he doesn't handle change well but you would think he would be familiar with the day to day routine especially if it doesn't deviate that much

    so you wrote a letter to "B" and now "J"; must be a boy thing; I'm thinking your daughter is a "saint?"


  2. oh my! At least mine rotate which one throws the fits:)

    Hey- I'm having a fundraiser Blog Party next week on Please stop by if you get a second! It should be fun:)

  3. Hoping J gets this "transition" thing figured out sooner rather than later ... that must be seriously frustrating!

  4. I hope that he starts doing the stairs and figuring things out soon.