The End of the Story

That evening, after the reunion cocktail party and after drinks, S and I conferenced about TK. We had learned that he worked for a huge internet company and had started out at a little internet start up that had been bought by this huge internet company recently for a lot of money. We figured that not only had he won in the looks department, since 15 years seems to have made him incredibly more good looking than in high school (partly due to braces, growing taller and clearing adult skin), but also had probably won in the making lots of money department. Not much better to come back to your reunion as than as a millionaire. We decided to ask him about it the next day.

We arrived at C’s house for the scheduled brunch the next morning and loaded up our plates right behind TK so that we could engineer a prime location at the table. I succeeded in sitting right next to him and didn’t take very long to just come out with the question of the day. “S and I were talking about you last night and we were wondering if you were a millionaire?” Anyone truly surprised I'm so rude? TK shifted uncomfortably in his chair as he laughed. He eventually said he had done well but it was mostly on paper rather than in actual money. It was settled then for us at least, TK was most improved. Here he was, the antithesis of his high school self. He appeared self confident, way more than self-supporting, well dressed, well spoken, handsome, well built, and as intelligent as we would expect having gone to our high school. What a transformation!

Lest you think that dollar signs appeared in my eyes at this point, I was self sufficient, thank you very much. Yes, wouldn't it be nice if a billionaire appeared out of the woodwork to sweep me off my feet, but that is not this story. The insane magnetic attraction I had for him had started the night before. Before I knew anything about his current life. The possibility that he was financially secure? Just icing on the cake. I'm not completely without greed.

The day continued with a tour of our old high school complete with TK and I returning to our teenage behaviors of substituting physical abuse for affection. While touring the library there were elbows to the ribs, and sudden stops, pushes and kicking while in a single file line as we traipsed through narrow aisles. This was our very mature way of saying that we had both noticed each other, and it was apparently a good conclusion we each had drawn about the other. Sadly we had to part again until dinner, but that would be even better as we could act like adults and actually have a conversation. I was very happy that I could once again engineer a seat next to TK, albeit across from JF the snake. TK and I immediately started flirting again, and after dinner was ordered immediately dove into a rehashing of what had happened back 15 years ago when our friendship had come to an end. We needed to clear the air so we could get back to what was happening between us now!

Once it was established that a monumental misunderstanding had taken place with all the letter writing and misinterpretations, we both apologized and began our friendship as adults for the first time. We caught up on life, (with the noticeable exception of talking about our current relationships at home), and couldn’t stop finding excuses to bump into each other and pat arms sympathetically and even posed for the camera with arms around each other. The magnetism between us was almost overwhelming in its strength. It was like we were pulled together, like a force as strong as the magnets in a supercollider drew us physically and mentally towards the other.

We continued on during that evening, after we had all adjourned to someone’s house for more talk, talking when we had the chance, glancing meaningfully at each other when we didn’t, all the time feeling that need to understand what we were experiencing. Never had we felt such a draw to another person, was it just silly reunion behavior? Was it significant, and if so, what were we going to do about the people we were dating back home? The evening ended with a hug and some tears on my part and a promise to email when we got home. I was in shock. When I had arrived at the reunion I had at home what I thought was the best relationship I had ever had, thinking I might have even met my future husband, and having already let him move in with me in anticipation of the relationship working out. I left the reunion wondering how I could ever be with anyone else but TK. How could I marry someone else and not always wonder about how it would have been with TK? When would I ever feel that pull towards another person I had felt with him? Leaving him at that last party took everything out of me, but I was not free to even ask him about what we should do, we were both attached.

Needless to say, when I got home I struggled for days to be the dutiful girlfriend. The reality was that TK was in California and I was in Maryland. Even if we weren’t attached it wouldn’t be possible to date. And we were both committed to someone else. We emailed each other off and on for 6 months, steadfastly trying to make our relationships work with the people to whom we had committed ourselves. TK and I aren’t the type to just dump people and run when something else comes along. Commitment is our middle name and we both have the tendency to stick through with people who are treating us like crap. Oh yes ladies, it’s not just a woman’s tendency to stick with the jerks in life, men do it too. Or at least sensitive nice guys do it. TK had faith that the woman who had been leading him on for almost 2 years would suddenly pull her head out of her ass and come live with him in California like she’d said she would and I firmly believed my boyfriend would grow a set of real man testicles. Literally.

Then everything changed.  First, my relationship ended with a whimper. I turned to my boyfriend one night and said ‘you know, it just doesn’t seem like you want to be here and maybe you’re staying out of some sense of obligation to me’ to which his response was ‘well I figured that since I was living in your house I kind of owed you.’ Uungh. That’s a shot to the heart. Don’t do me any favors asshole. Get the hell out.

I immediately emailed TK that my boyfriend had just left me, and not an hour later I got a phone call from him. We talked every night from that point on, about relationships and how he was still in one that was non-functional and deserved to be treated better.  Within 2 weeks he finally lost the baggage (dumped her) and began his recovery process. After a week or two of comforting each other, there was nothing left to do but see if what we felt at the reunion was still present. He came to Maryland to visit me, and seconds after stepping off the plane his lips were locked onto my face like we derived our oxygen from each other.  It was all but decided by the end of the weekend: we were in love. All the feelings that had been stored up from 15 years before and from that weekend back in Illinois 6 months before came gushing out of our mouths and ears and eyeballs until we couldn’t see straight.  Insanity leads to all sorts of crazy decisions.

Thus began my journey to the other end of the continent. Thus began my journey into the rest of my life with the man of my dreams. I may continue recounting it right here on this blog. Lucky you!